There is this incredible truth that is terrifying and beautiful at the same time. The truth is that Jesus knows your true heart and its intentions. If your heart is pure, He knows it and this truth will bring you comfort and joy. If your heart is dark this will make you fearful.
These past years of being involved in the Church I have come in contact with many many people. In the past, when I would meet people, I would see only the good in them. I would trust them instantly and I wouldn't question their motives or even think they could be hiding the truth. Now I know that people are not always truthful and it takes time to get to know someone's true heart.
Maybe you are the one who is pretending. This facade is detrimental to your growth. Pretending to be something you are not will hurt you and those around you. This happens with Christians very often. When they are around other believers they say all the right things and they play the part but their true hearts show when they are around non-christian friends or when they are alone. Your true heart shows when no-one else is watching.
This is not the way to live.
Keeping a facade up is exhausting and eventually the people around you will figure out who you really are. Without honesty & sincerity, your relationships will fall apart and you will find yourself surrounded by a mess. You might feel like you have no other choice...if you tell people the truth about your struggles you think they will disown you or be disgusted with you, but that's not true at all. Being truthful deepens your relationships. You do not have to stay stuck in your sin. Stop pretending to be someone you are not, because deep down we are all a mess. Bring your mess to the light and ask for help. God has big plans for you and He is waiting on you to accept His guidance.
Acts 1:24 "You Lord, who know the hearts of all..."